Too Much Pineapple? No Such Thing!
by Koohii Kappu
Summary: Collection of drabbles from the weekly drabble challenge in the Psychfic forum Decided to post some here since they recently started up again! Ratings don't apply to all the chapters, so I'll warn you in the chapter notes when they do.
1. A Special Anniversary

**So this is for the weekly drabble challenge in the Psychfic forums. I wasn't going to post this here because I only just caught the tail end of the challenge and I only had this one little 200 word short, but they've recently started up again, which means new prompts every week! =D So I thought, "Why not? I'll start posting on FanFiction, too."**

 **So yaaaay~ ^^**

 **Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**

* * *

Everything had been swept off the counter and now lay broken off to the side, and the bare tabletop was now drenched by what could only have been Niagra Falls. Scraps of curtains were shredded and scattered across the floor, now muddy and useless. The only remains of the culprit were the wet splashes where her paws had trod across the tiles.

"Once we find that cat, I'm going to kill you," Henry huffed, just barely containing his wrath.

"She's probably just terrified," Shawn reasoned, choosing to brush off the death threat. "Your shirts do tend to have that effect on people."

"It's a cat, Shawn! It's too stupid to know the difference! What ever made you think it would be a good idea to bring that thing into my house, anyway?"

"I thought it would make a nice anniversary gift, since you have to spend it all by yourself."

"You only get anniversary gifts when you're married, Shawn," Henry growled, trotting to the window and scanning the yard in hopes of a glace of the convict.

"Same difference," Shawn shrugged, then froze as his eyes landed on an empty cardboard box.

"She stole my pineapple upside-down cake!" he wailed.

* * *

 ***awkward silence***


	2. The Black and the Blue

**This week's new prompt~ The rating applies here . . . as does a character death warning. That's all I'm saying~ *backs away into mysterious shadows***

 **Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**

* * *

"Goodnight . . . sleep tight . . . don't let the bedbugs bite . . ."

The simple melody echoed off the walls, the only sign that there was any living thing in the darkness.

"If they do-" she hummed the next part while she passed the blade between the cloth, "hmm mm hmm, stab them 'till they're black and blue . . ."

"Those aren't the right words."

The singing stopped and Yang played with the tip of the knife. "No?" she responded a little too lightly. "Should I have said 'crimson red'?"

"It goes, 'smack them till they're black and blue'."

Yang shrugged and turned the chair to face her father. "Whatever. They'll all dead."

Her emotionless gaze met her father's. A slow, cold grin crept up his mouth and he moved to kneel next to his daughter, playing with her dark hair.

"Who next, daddy?" she whispered.

"How about that blonde one? The psychic is fond of her, isn't he?"

Yang let a small "hmm" escape from her lips. "Could be fun," she mused, looking down at the battered corpse of the once Head Detective. A small smile began to spread.

"Yeah . . . it could be fun."

* * *

 **Before you all kill me, I just want to say that I am sorry, and I completely understand your murderous rage. XP Bit of advice - never give a whump addict a title like "The Black and the Blue". It's just too easy =D**


	3. Hiding Space

**This week's prompt~ Obviously, I don't own anything from Psych, or y'all would've been crying a lot more XD**

* * *

 _Pain._

The memories pulled Shawn forward, guiding him between the low branches that exploded with fiery leaves like fireworks on a July night. His body swiftly wove through, remembering every tiny dip in the earth's surface, every fallen branch that would trip him, that one stray wire in the fence that used to stab him.

 _Tears._

Shawn hesitated at the familiar opening, then took a deep breath and crawled into the tiny hollow inside the bushes. Jamie was a tiny mess of blonde hair, hugging her knees like they where an anchor keeping her from blowing away in a storm. She didn't look up.

"How did you know I'd be here?" Jamie mumbled.

"This used to be my hiding place," Shawn answered. "I used to come here when I didn't want to be found."

A sniff. Tentatively, Shawn reached his arm around her tiny shoulders, drawing her close. She sat with him, tears no longer hidden.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "Mommy and I won't fight anymore."

"Promise?"

Suddenly Shawn was a kid again.

Curled up.

Alone.

And his heart broke.

"I promise," he whispered.

Jamie took a deep, shuddering breath, and snuggled in deeper.

And Shawn felt something new.

 _Peace._

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 **Please don't forget to tell me what you thought! ^^**


	4. Swish, Buzz, Pop

**This week's prompt! As always, I own nothing. Also no warnings or ratings apply here, it's just sweet fluffiness this time~ ^^**

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" _Swish_ goes the breeze, playing in the trees. _Buzz_ goes the bee, flitting 'round my knee."

Lassiter paused, frowning. _There's no way the whole thing is like this, right?_ He thumbed through, bewilderment deepening as he only saw more pages that were ridiculously oversized for the amount of words they held. Lily looked up at her father, curious.

"Maybe mommy wants to read?" He gave a short smile.

"No. Daddy reads," Lily insisted.

Lassiter grumbled as Carlowe whispered, "She's two, Carlton. Just read the darn book."

Signing, he continued, " _Pop_ goes the bubble, drifting in the air."

 _That one didn't even rhyme!_

Lassiter looked helplessly up at his wife, only to meet another prodding gaze as she lifted a load of laundry and left him on the battlefront. Sighing, he watched her leave, slowly realizing something as Marlowe's slender back moved out of sight. Whispering, he continued the story -

" _Bang_ goes the Glock, cleaning convicts' clocks."

"Don't make me use your middle name, Carlton!" Marlowe hollered from the other room. Lassiter sunk lower in the chair, muttering to himself while Lily burst into giggles.

"Again!" She clapped her hands.

"Bedtime," he said curtly, shutting the book with a snap.

* * *

 **Uhh and now I have to wait a whole week for a new prompt XP I just have too much fun with these~!**


	5. Today's News

**I dunno what happened here. XD *shrugs* We were getting close to the deadline, and for some reason my brain was totally dead, and I guess this just . . . happened . . .**

* * *

"Sir, can you hear me?"

Gus slowly cracked open his eyes and then rapidly blinked at the sudden sunlight.

How had he gotten outside?

And in the middle of a semi-busy street?!

"Sir?" repeated the voice. Gus skimmed his surroundings for his rescuer until his chocolate spheres met concerned, shining blue ones. A kid. Mussed brown locks stuffed under a newsboy cap, a stack of newspapers tucked under his arm, ink and dirt stains framing his plump red cheeks.

"Are you alright?"

"I think so . . . my friend and I were looking at statues, and then . . . Have you seen my friend? I don't know where I am-"

"You're in New York."

Gus blinked. "New York?! Did Shawn put you up to this?"

"Who's Shawn?" Now it was the kid's turn to look confused. "You seem okay," he said, turning. "If you're not gonna buy a paper mister, then I'm gonna go finish-"

"Wait," Gus grabbed his shoulder. "I'll buy one, okay? Here's a dollar."

The kid's eyes widened. "Deal!"

As he shot off into the crowd, Gus flipped the newspaper over to read the front page:

New York Daily Column  
May 27th, 1968

"196- Oh HECK no! I'm gonna KILL Shawn!"

* * *

 **Crossover-ish thing with Doctor Who. 'Cause, like, Weeping Angels XD I dunno, blame my friend, she was the one who told me to write the first thing that came to mind! :P (Kidding girl love you~)**


	6. Under the Influence

**Made a thing and almost forgot to post it XD**

* * *

Something about O'Hara was . . . off.

She was distracted. She forgot things she normally wouldn't forget. She spaced out in the middle of the day and smiled at nothing. She wouldn't look him in the eye sometimes, and she would get a little jumpy for no reason.

She tried to hide it from him, but Lassiter saw. He knew what the signs meant. It made him sick to think that she, of all people - his own PARTNER - could be wrapped up in something like this. He wasn't sure what to do at first, when he'd seen her in the empty interrogation room, doing . . . _that_. He decided to confront her, but she got angry at him.

It's not her fault, he justified as she stalked away in a huff. She was sick. Not thinking clearly. Not in her right mind. She was convincing herself that this was what she needed to be happy, blinding her to how it was slowly killing her, bound to end in pain and regret.

It was the psychic's fault for taking advantage of her. For . . . _kissing_ her.

 _But I'll fix her,_ Lassiter thought with growing resolve. _I'll make her understand._

Love is just a drug.

* * *

 **'Kay bye**


	7. Inspire Me

**I forgot to add the drabble from like two weeks ago :P Sorry! But now you get two =D Btw, I was really hyper and stuff and it's ridiculous, but no warnings and no rating apply~ ^^**

* * *

"Shawn, what did you do to the office?!"

Gus gestured to the pile of junk that was threatening to smother BOTH of their desks, but Shawn barely even looked up.

"Gus! Buddy! I know this looks bad, but all of these things are narcessities!"

"It's _necessities_ , and since when have you ever needed a figure of a dolphin wearing a top hat?" Gus demanded.

"C'mon, tell me it's not the coolest!"

"And the bag of tropical-flavored chocolates?"

"Dude - Try them."

"And is this a rainbow stuffed sloth?!"

"The tag said it was cake-scented, but I think it smells like someone lit all your girly candles at once."

"Shawn!"

"Look, dude, it all inspires me! I need it to feed my muse, she's a very picky eater-"

"Inspires you for WHAT?"

"This!" Shawn flipped the notebook to reveal lines upon lines of writing. "I'm making a novel!"

Gus snorted. "YOU? You can't even correctly place your proportions!"

"You're in the story too."

"Really?" Gus perked up. "What am I-"

"You die from a heart attack in chapter two when someone touches your stuffed fire engine toy."

Gus grabbed the papers, lit all his scented candles and burned the story to ashes.

* * *

 **Yeah, like I said, I was hyper XD The next one, though . . . it's legit the polar opposite of this :P See you there (hopefully XD)**


	8. All That Glitters

**The T rating applies here. :P Sorry~**

* * *

They say that when you meet The One, the whole world looks different. Brighter. Shinier. More colorful and vibrant.

Nobody mentioned that when they leave, they take all that beauty with them.

He found himself struggling to re-adjust as his world was suddenly plunged into darkness, like someone had switched off the power to the sun. Against his better judgement, he ghosted from pub to pub, fighting the withdrawals from the light he was so used to having, searching endlessly for an easy fix. Drinking made laughter shine, jewelry flash like bolts of lightning, glasses sparkle like they held a million stars that tingled on his lips-

Sprawled out in the midst of glaring sweat and serrated blades that dug into his skull, Carlton had to admit that alcohol was a poor substitute for love. But it was too late for him now. Victoria had gotten him hooked, and now he was condemned to chase all that glittered until God himself finally told him to rest.

"And they all lived happily ever after," Carlton blurted. For some reason his intoxicated brain found that very funny, and he laughed himself to sleep just as sunlight started peeking through the curtains.

* * *

 **I did warn you that it would be dark XD I don't know what it is with me a comparing love to dangerous addictions lately . . . but I really like it XP Please tell me what you thought~! I'm interested in your responses! ^^**


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